Archive for February, 2014

Let me tell you about my week

February 21, 2014

I am too lazy to type anymore, and I already wrote a column today, so I am simply going to post a bunch of pictures with snarky captions.  Here’s what I did this week.

I went the doctor and because it was a cheap $25 clinic doctor it took four hours.

What's the big deal. We have free sign language in South Africa too. Anyone can do it, right?

What’s the big deal. We have free sign language in South Africa too. Anyone can do it, right?

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I live in a pretty multicultural community.

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How come everybody in LA has the lowest rates? Cause everybody in LA lies.

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I made a school project and dropped it at the Orange Senior Center for my extras along with copies of the photos.

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You don’t want to know what happened as a result of this photo. Too much drama, man, too much drama…

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Her: Hahahahahah
Him: [boobies] I’m a winner.
Her: Hahahahahha!
I bet the clients at Hustler Casino look nothing like him.

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I went for a romantic stroll on the beach alone on Valentine’s day. This is my favourite beach writing. But I didn’t write it, and I wouldn’t.

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I’m grateful that I saw this. I wanted to share it with another human being but a blog and whatsapp to a sleeping SA will have to do.

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Because my internet still wasn’t working, I went to Amoeba Music at 10pm, and bought Season Three of Curb Your Enthusiasm.

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Don’t want to get into an accident with this dude. Something tells me he’s packing.

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Serious Drought Help Save Water. I drive past this sign about 8 times, every day. Rents may be lower in LA but after you factor in gas, I reckon it’s as expensive as New York…

I feared that this would become my future. After all, this guy apparently went to USC film school and look where he wound up.

I feared that this would become my future. After all, this guy apparently went to USC film school and look where he wound up.

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But it’s not all bad. While I was doing my laundry I found the best sandwich shop, ice cream parlor and smoothie place ever on Pico. I hope NPR never finds it or it’ll get full and probably expensive.

And then there’s stuff like writing, sleeping… and eating that I skipped. But I did it.

And that was my week in pictures. How was yours?

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Parking in LA is the tampon of living in LA

February 10, 2014

It’s bloody hell. Actually that was a gratuitous pun. It’s a pain in the ass… no I don’t do that with tampons. Okay, done with the puns, then. Parking…

You can live in a suburb, like mine, where you rarely need to walk to do your daily stuff. I have coffee shops, supermarkets… and amazing 24 hour spas, cheap massage places, great takeout, all within 10 minutes’ walk of my apartment.

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Boba. Coffee Boba. Apparently this will kill me. But have you tasted it? It is heaven.

But even if I didn’t want to leave my neighborhood, I’d still have to move my car at least once a week, on Wednesdays, for 3 hours – and that’s if I were not parked in the anti-gridlock zone (move your care between 7 and 9am) or on the street cleaning street (move your car between 2-5am), or the no parking on Thursdays zone…

You can live without a car in LA – there is plenty of public transport everywhere except Santa Monica. But why would you want to? If you wanted to live in a village, you wouldn’t be in LA to start with. Only the rich people in LA want to live in a village (they live in Santa Monica) because hey, rich folks can leave the village in a limo whenever they like. The point and joy of Los Angeles is how much it has to offer. The small problem with it is that it’s so sprawling and crazy that you absolutely need a car to actually LIVE there… and that’s why parking is like tampons here. Why tampons?

Cause, sure, you could make do with rags, or pads, for a few days, or just squat over the toilet. But who wants to do that? Nobody, that’s who.

So of course, everybody overcharges like crazy for parking in LA. A spot with an automated gate will push your rent up by $300 in Hollywood. Something off street will be around $75. And there’s a queue for that. It’s about two years long in Koreatown. I often park about 10 minutes walk from where I live. I have a sure bet spot that opens up often outside what I suspect is a crack house.

Head to a popular beach for a dip? Parking is $15 flat at Huntington. How about Hollywood Boulevard? Well, it’s $5. I’ve been here so long I was excited by that price, tonight. That sounded cheap.

I parked in a 2-hour government run parking spot. $4 for that two hours. Then I ran back and fed the meter for another 20 minutes – 50C. Then I left the event I’d been invited to by Eventbrite, by someone I still have not identified. But thanks – a really cool gig called Hollywood Shorts. More on that sometime soon.

Can you read the sign? It says five dollars, right?

Can you read the sign? It says five dollars, right? Wrong. If you get to the gate, it says $5 per 30 minutes in very, very small print. Flat rate is $20 til midnight.

The superbowel… my journey in Koreatown.

February 3, 2014

I felt a rare passion for the game. Rare because I never cared about it before, not because I have a clue what’s going on, or because I care who wins. It just represents something about the USA that I seem to be excluded from and want to be in on.

I have changed, I realise. The last time I was in South Africa, as much as I love my homeland, I felt like I didn’t belong among my pregnant, married, and increasingly suburban friends. I have missed having what they have – I’ll never share it with them… I have missed that bar stool forever. And coming back, I felt… like I didn’t belong. Among my 22-28 year old American friends. Cause I’ll never be that young and sure of myself again.

So I bounced around my apartment reading books with jetlag for a day, then got sick, then went to Sundance, came back still sick, and made plans with a friend to watch the game.

Now. I have this thing that I can’t give up. I should but I don’t. I think it’s a major qualification for MAKING MOVIES, which is my new job, so probably a good thing, apart from the fact that it hurts so bad.

So I googled for a while and found a bar 2.5 miles away and walked there, alone. I thought maybe there, I’ll connect with someone who like me wants their life to explode, who wants to connect, who is a grown up but also can’t stop growing. I set out walking.

The sky boiled with rain above me. As I passed men walking I realised how much the world has changed for me since I was like… 25. I used to know that when men looked at me it was lust. Now, they still do. But is it lust or curiosity? “Why are they so big?” “Why is she still alone?”

Proof that people are assholes. And that dogs are gross, basically.

Proof that people are assholes. And that dogs are gross, basically.

Somebody died at this bus stop on Normandie.

Somebody died at this bus stop on Normandie.

I feel sorry for myself sometimes but wtf. I have slept in worse places, in hotels that offered worse, but never owned a mattress this bad.

I feel sorry for myself sometimes but wtf. I have slept in worse places, in hotels that offered worse, but never owned a mattress this bad.

A hostel / gallery thing of some sort. I wanted to check it out but I think it was closed for superbowl.

A hostel / gallery thing of some sort. I wanted to check it out but I think it was closed for superbowl.

I arrived. It was a bar full of people who were nice to me but hey... they had their friends already. And my team was losing so hopelessly that i left before half time and after a half pint.

I arrived. It was a bar full of people who were nice to me but hey… they had their friends already. And my team was losing so hopelessly that i left before half time and after a half pint. Broncos! Sigh.

Chickens! For some reason there's a display case full of them. My mom eats, keeps and is obsessed with chickens - she even collects chicken shaped things that have some function apart from being... chicken. Is she secretly Korean? Or just a bit creepy maybe. She might be. We are related.

Chickens! For some reason there’s a display case full of them. My mom eats, keeps and is obsessed with chickens – she even collects chicken shaped things that have some function apart from being… chicken. Is she secretly Korean? Or just a bit creepy maybe. She might be. We are related.

Walking home on Western. It's the shortest route. The sunset was a sad one and I felt like the only living girl in LA.

Walking home on Western. It’s the shortest route. The sunset was a sad one and I felt like the only living girl in LA.

The Wiltern. If I have a film company in the US one day, I want offices here.

The Wiltern. If I have a film company in the US one day, I want offices here.

Once were video stores.

Once were video stores. Am glad that was never my dream.

This is like a blast from the past. But in the USA, you can still advertise drugs. A superbowl ad pushes military service and Budweiser. Fucking sinister, in my opinion.

This is like a blast from the past. But in the USA, you can still advertise drugs. A superbowl ad pushes military service and Budweiser. Fucking sinister, in my opinion.

I spotted about 8 coffee places I never noticed before. All within .5 miles walking of me. Google maps sucks compared to actually being there.

I spotted about 8 coffee places I never noticed before. All within .5 miles walking of me. Google maps sucks compared to actually being there. This good, for me.

Some history at a traffic light.

Some history at a traffic light.

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See the guy on the left in the photo? He followed me all the way home. I felt he was non-threatening, cause he kept his distance. I realise now he probably did it cause he thought I was taking pictures of him. But I didn’t even notice him at the time. He’s one of the many homeless people living along Olympic Boulevard, named to celebrate the 1988 games.

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I figured out just yesterday how to sneak on to our building rooftop. Every time I feel sad, it helps to go there. So that's what I did at the end of tonight, and here is what I saw.

I figured out just yesterday how to sneak on to our building rooftop. Every time I feel sad, it helps to go there. So that’s what I did tonight, and here is what I saw.

Total walking today: about 5.2miles. Whenever I can, I walk. I see the world differently that way.

When all else fails, work. That’s my plan and I’m sticking to it.