Planned Parenthood gets stiffed by Boehner

Healthcare costs are too high. The Republicans seek to solve this problem by encouraging unwanted population growth. It’s all in the hands of a guy called Boehner. I think this is what they mean when they say “I’m laughing through my tears.”

As I write, America is threatened by enemies from within, with conservatives and not-quite-as-conservatives locked in a battle of lies, name-calling and mudslinging that mostly involves them accusing each other of being “extreme”. It seems like being “extreme” is much worse, here in America, than being “asshole”, “murderer”. Everybody’s desperately trying to prove that they’re “moderate”, which seems to be analogous to “fair”, as if being fair were about “not taking a side”, ever, for or against anything. By the time I’ve finished having coffee at a place opposite Amoeba Records (I know, it doesn’t seem real to me either!) a Government Shutdown may be in effect. It’s pretty much all NPR‘s been talking about all day – they interrupted it briefly with traffic reports and a story about the National Whistling Festival. Oh and a story about a priest in Poland building the world’s biggest Jesus statue.

The republicans are attacking two things simultaneously: Planned parenthood and healthcare, in order to give more money back to business in tax cuts. Yes, you heard right. They feel that healthcare costs are too high. Their solution is to ensure… UNWANTED POPULATION GROWTH.

And this email just hit my inbox…

Planned Parenthood
Dear Jean,
The unthinkable is happening today in Washington, and we urgently need your action.
As I write this, Representative John Boehner is caving to extremists in Congress and preparing to shut down the federal government because of their outdated and outrageous ideology, devastating the daily lives of millions of Americans. They will not rest until they have closed every single Planned Parenthood health center in the country, no matter the consequences.

Why am I getting mail from them? I was trying to make friends with them in the hope that they’d let me shoot my short film at their clinic. No chance of that. Thanks to crazy right-wingers who don’t want to pay for a child’s healthcare once it’s born but DO want to make sure every fetus gets popped out, Planned Parenthood is like a fortress, and they won’t so much as give you a form to fill out until you make an appointment.

Thanks to America's aging population problem, the streets are littered with creaky protesters who have nothing better to do than complain about stuff that's none of their business.

So I gave up on that. But I do still support their mission. And I can’t believe they’re under attack from a guy whose name sounds suspiciously like the slang term for an erect penis.

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3 Responses to “Planned Parenthood gets stiffed by Boehner”

  1. happypoppeye Says:

    C’mon man, do you really think “the republicans seek to solve this problem by encouraging unwanted population growth?”. Do you think this is the first comment just by chance?
    Stop being an idiot.

  2. jeanbarker Says:

    Only a republican would take me seriously. But since you are, what’s your argument again? Cause all I hear is “stop being an idiot” which is neither funny nor intelligent.

  3. Spear The Almighty Says:

    Lol! Nice comeback.

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