Rabid bats are plaguing California! Well actually, one rabid bat was discovered after it died, and someone bothered to figure out why it snuffed it, NPR recently reported. But of course it’s news, because well, it’s awesome news, offering great punning opportunities, and in the past, people have died after being bitten.
This is America, so a few searches turned up some cool signs, advising people not to fondle bats, no matter how adorable they were.
The question I have, though, is this: How do you tell if a bat is crazy? Do they fly all over the place with their eyes closed? No, they do that already. Or, do they start bumping into walls suddenly? Swooping down to steal fat people’s hamburgers?
Maybe you know for sure if you find a bat in your kitchen, making itself a cup of coffee or reading the newspaper.